UFC 62 - Trio Preview.

Ric 'Call me Dic Lesbian' Gillespie
Art 'the name' Shimko
and I:
Old Country Caretaker

Present UFC 62 Preview and Predictions table.

Who'd we pick? How many Gay jokes did I make about Ric? all will be revealed if you:


First up we have the man who's idea this was, and who as a result wrote less than the others, with a professional record of 10 knockouts and 22 tapouts, in his 0-32 record career: Ric "not Sheiky" Gillespie~!!! crowd geers ***

OCC Comment: Hey Ric, next time you should get Sheiky's picks.

Las Vegas' Mandalay Bay Events Center plays host to tonight's pay-per-view. For the general public and the diehard fans, it's really a two-match show (but
that's nothing new with all of the added shows in 2006).
Everyone's made weight and there's little else to do but step into the Octagon. We'll, of course, be providing complete results of the show, but because
I'll be busy for the rest of the evening, they may not be posted until tomorrow.
Ricky D's analysis
When I originally came up with our three-way, I didn't realize how much writing this was going to contain, so in the hopes of making things a little easier
on the eyes and your attention spans, I've shortened up my end by a considerable margin:
Yushin Okami vs. Alan Belcher - Okami
Rob MacDonald vs. Eric Schafer - MacDonald
Cory Walmsley vs. David Heath - Walmsley, who is a sometime-pro-wrestler, as opposed to Heath, who isn't a wrestler, he's just shares the same name.
Wes Combs vs. Wilson Gouveia - Gouveia
Hermes Franca vs. Jamie Varner - Franca
Cheick Kongo vs. Christian Wellisch - "Awesome Kong"o. No special reason, I just wanted to use that nickname.
Nick Diaz vs. Josh Neer - Nothing against Neer, who's an awesome fighter, but I've got to go with Diaz.
Forrest Griffin vs. Stephan Bonnar - Has anyone had a more difficult fight to live up to?! I am really torn on this one, both on how good it will be and
the winner. I think it'll be an impressive fight, but nothing like the first, with Griffin taking the decision.
Chuck Liddell vs. Renato Sobral - Sobral's good, damn good, and probably holds the edge on the ground and in submissions. Liddell, though, is nearly impossible
to take down, even harder to keep there, and (if the last fight is any indication) looks to have a huge edge on their feet. I'm sorry, Sobe, but I'm looking
for Liddell to finish you (TKO or KO) in the third or fourth round.

There you have it from the man who's finish is to run around in circles until either he or his opponent gets dizzy.

Next up we've got Art Shimko who has never competed in a fight due to the fact he's busy adding words to the title of his blog

Art says...

UFC 62 preview
by Art Shimko
schlocknhyperbole@verizon.net
http://schlocknhyperbole.blogspot.com/

Tonight is UFC 62 at the Mandalay Bay Events Center in Las Vegas
featuring two main events: Chuck Liddell vs Renato "Babalu" Sobral for
the UFC Light Heavyweight Title and the long-awaited rematch between
Stephan Bonnar and Forrest Griffin, one that took a year-and-a-half to
book for some reason but nonetheless I am excited to see this and
Liddell/Sobral as I feel both will be pure battles.

As cliché as this will sound I am going for Liddell as the winner of his
fight tonight against Babalu which is not to say that Babalu's a hack as
I expect this fight to go the distance or at least close to it, plus
he's won his last 10 fights after losing to Liddell at UFC 40, there's a
chance of him winning and as you know anything can happen in a real
fight. Babalu seemed very confident on this week's "All Access" special
on Spike and confidence is half the battle, the other is making sure he
doesn't slip on the mat and eat a vicious punch or kick by Liddell.

In one of the most highly anticipated rematches in UFC, Bonnar and
Griffin will deliver in their quest to each get a win but most
importantly scrap it out in the octagon like two pit bulls who've been
locked up in a cage with a slab of raw meat dangling on the outside thus
elevating their hunger to a dangerous level. Griffin is coming off a
loss to Tito Ortiz in a bout that many thought he should've got the
winning decision and since that battle with Bonnar last April has had
victories at UFC 53 and 55. Bonnar has been fighting mostly on Ultimate
Fight Night shows and won three fights after Griffin with his last win
against Keith Jardine feeling a bit suspect to some people. Bonnar lost
his last fight against Rashad Evans and didn't look so good, it was as
if he just wasn't into it, that or he didn't have a game plan against
Evans. Anyway, this fight is quite the hyped little deal and whether it
lives up to the hype or not you can rest assured that these two will try
their damnedest to have a hell of a fight. My prediction is that Bonnar
will avenge his loss against Griffin tonight.

The rest of the fighters I am not familiar with so I will go by fight
records which may not the most reliable method to go by but it's all I
have as a source so these predictions will be short and sweet.

- Josh Neer Vs. Nick Diaz: winner - Neer

- Cheick Kongo Vs. Christian Wellisch: winner - Kongo

- Hermes Franca Vs. Jamie Varner: winner - Franca

- Wes Combs Vs. Wilson Gouveia: winner - Combs

- Cory Walmsley Vs. David Heath: winner - Walmsley

- Rob MacDonald Vs. Eric Schafer: winner - Schafer

- Yushin Okami Vs. Alan Belcher: winner - Okami

So we'll see how my predictions pan out but one thing's for sure and
that I'm looking forward to this PPV more than any recent WWE or TNA
PPV, it should be an exciting one, particularly the main events and I
hope that the early fights are decent as well.

There you have it from Art, and check out his blog and thank him for the sweet OCC banner that you haven't seen yet. Trust me its good. So thank him early and often.

Now for the lame event of the evening. Weighing in at "Yeah, like I'm gonna tell you that" fighting in the blood red trunks with blood red face, its That guy that rights here

I say...

UFC 62 Preview:

Well, its time for UFC 62. I’m going to admit that compared to my prognosticating companions I am uninformed when it comes to fighters, fighting styles and just plain fighting. I also don’t know as much about being a pussy as Ric does but I still feel that qualifies me to call him one. So, I used several non-scientific methods to predict the outcome of these bouts. Enjoy!

Dark Matches:
Yushin Okami “bless you”
Vs.
Alan Belcher “Yes, I know and it got old quickly”
Magic Eight ball says: “Hey, what the!? How’d you like it if I woke you up by shaking you without warning? You need to learn some respect, ever heard of a telephone call? An alarm clock, I don’t work on your time pal! Just for that, I’m not going to answer this question and you had it coming.”
Prediction: The guy who sneezes over the guy who belches.

Cory “warm” Walmsley
Vs.
David Heath “Bar”
Magic Eight ball says: All this shaking is making me dizzy.
Prediction: Corey Walmsley (I don’t trust anyone that shares a name with Gangrel)

Wes “Sherlock” Combs
Vs.
Wilson “Wilson Wilson” Gouveia
Magic eight ball says: “Why do people always ask me questions? What do I look like a magic eight ball?”
Prediction: Gouveia (I liked him on Home Improvement)

Eric Schafer “back”
Vs.
Rob McDonald “E, I, E, I, O”
The magic eight ball says: “Ric is gay”. Hey, I didn’t know that was a possible answer.
Prediction: Rob McDonald (he needs this one for the farm!)

The Main Card:
Jamie “Varnerlei Silva?” Varner
Vs.
Hermes “don’t call him Herpes, you learn after the third or forth time” Franca
Ah, light weights. If they were any lighter, they’d just be weights.
We’re going to once again consult the eight ball that served us so well during the dark matches.
“Oh magic eight ball, will it be Jamie?” (shakes ball) … “Ask again later”.
“Oh Magic eight ball, will Varner be victorious?” (Shakes ball) … “Ask again later”
“Oh Magic eight ball will Hermes be the winner?” (shakes ball) … “Ask again later”.
“Oh Magic eight ball, tell me does Franca win the fight? (shakes ball) … “Ask again later”.
I regret to inform you that the magic eight ball mysteriously jumped really hard up against the wall, almost as though the hand of God came down and flung it that direction. Hmm, well it’s an unsolvable mystery so we’ll close the case right now.
I think that I will have to predict the fight myself. I think that to figure out who will win this fight, the task will be much simpler once the fight has reached its conclusion.
Prediction 1: Nobody laughs at that line.
Prediction 2: Hermes Franca (I just like the name better)

Christian Wellisch “e hot?”
Vs.
Cheick “Conga Conga” Kongo
We’re still using the magic eight ball. It might not be working so well after I tossed (Uh, I mean it mysteriously was hurled, but clearly not by me) in to the wall after the incident with the last fight but we’ll give it a shot.
“Oh Magic eight ball, will Kongo be victorious?”
*shakes ball: “abwrivuftfygjhfvbzcgripfuiyreriwueyrois”
I think the eight ball has spoken.
Prediction: I believe the eight ball has made it abundantly clear weren’t you reading? (we'll take Congo)

Forrest “call me Gump just one more time and…hey, calling me Peter isn’t any funnier” Griffin
Vs.
Stephan “Its not enough to be a Psycho, I’ve got to be an American Psycho” Bonner
First thought, gees these nicknames are long, hopefully Bruce Buffer can shorten them or this show will be dominated by ring introductions.
Here’s the deal, I don’t expect that this fight will be as exciting as the first. Those are high standards to live up to and even if they can do it, it is far more likely that if expectations are that high that they won’t be met and disappointment will reign.
I do think this fight will be very good. There is just something about these 2, they go together. Kind of like: Ice Cream and a Giant inferno, Ranch dressing and motor oil, you know, things that you just can’t imagine ever not being linked together.
Oh yeah, the fight. Well, Griffin barely lost to Tito Ortiz his last time out but Bonner hasn’t looked like anything special in his last couple of fights. I think Stephan is just bound to lose again.
Prediction: Griffin (and I don’t think it goes the distance)

Nick “The Replacement” Diaz
Vs.
Josh Neer (…far, Neer…far, Neer…far, Neer…far)
Here is what I know about this fight, from research I have done. (that might be the funniest joke I’ve made all day) Diaz has lost the last 3 fights I’ve seen him in, and Neer has lost the last fight I’ve seen him in. I’m certain they both can’t keep those streaks going.
Josh Neer is supposedly called the dentist because after being knocked out by him some fighters needed dental work. Well, in that case if the name is supposed to be inspired from real life, my nickname for Gillespie is “doormat”.
So, here is my super-duper megascientific, so awesomely scientific analysis that we have to put the word mega in front of it as a warning of its power. Uh, what was I talking about again? Oh yeah, the thing where they fight. Ok, here goes, I am going to predict Josh Neer wins because I love Nick Diaz but would love him a little less if he started winning these fights.
Prediction: If you couldn’t figure it out from the above paragraph, I’m not repeating it for you.

Renato “Babalu, Babalu, Babalu, Babaluya, Praise ye the Lord~!” Sobral
Vs.
Chuck “If I give him a stupid nickname he’ll probably kill me and I’d much rather he kill Ric” Liddell
You know my initial thought on this fight is that Liddell is pretty good. Now just hear me out, I think he’s so good, that should they ever decide to have a champion in the Light Heavyweight Division it should totally be him.
“Babaluya” has won like his last 10 fights in a row or something and 10 is a good round number. I remember being entertained by his last fight, at least I think it was him, he also fights under the name Diego Sanchez right?
For my most awesome analysis, Sobral can win this fight. He also can lose this fight. The key in predicting the eventual outcome will be trying to decide which one of those things will actually happen. I tried using the magic eight ball again but it just shouted a string of profanities back at me, I think its broken.
An upset wouldn’t shock me but I’m not going to pick it. It’s just too bad that we’re probably not going to see Wanderlei Silva “fuck chuck” at a later date after all.
Prediction: Liddell, (if he were champion, he’d retain, UFC really needs to hurry and create a title for this division)

Best fight: Griffin/Bonner, I expect the crowd to be most into this one.

Closing comment: The show looks good on paper, but that’s probably due to the smiley face I drew next to each fighter’s name. It looks like a 2 fight show with Nick Diaz providing entertainment simply by being Nick Diaz.

and there you have it. I'll try and figure out how we all did after the show. Everyone enjoy your beverage of choice, meal of choice and anything else of choice.