Smackdown Review - Air Date: 23rd March 2007
Firstly i would like to say a giant FUCK YOU! to the farmers for making me lose an hours sleep tonight and to Ohio State who have fucked my NCAA predictions now! Suck my fucking balls!
Now with that out of the way, let's get onto this show.
Vincent Kennedy McMahon made his way down to the ring in shitty Cleveland, Ohio to address the retards in attendance. Vince said he had fun on Raw this week and sent a message to Donald Trump with his actions towards Eugene, the official mascot of Ohio State University. A video recap then aired showing the destruction of Eugene by Umaga and subsequent shaving.
Vince then goes on a tirade about how when he shaves Trump bald at Wrestlemania, it will be him symbolically shaving every man, woman, child and baby in the arena. Vince likes them shaved is what i took from that statement. He also reminds us that he will be facing Bobby Lashley on Raw this coming Monday night and decides that he wants to have some fun tonight. He introduces who will be Lashley's opponent...KENNEDY! Mr. Kennedy comes down to the ring and Vince steals his line.
Proud of himself, he then introduces Lashley's other opponent...Randy Orton! Unable to control his excitement of having two shaven men in the ring...he climbs up on the top rope and does Randy Orton's pose. The crowd shit all over Orton which is fine by me. Orton then begins to verbally give Vince head with compliments, unable to wait his turn Kennedy grabs the mic and takes over the act.
Vince then announces that Lashley will be taking on both men at the same time (just the way Ric Gillespie likes it...joking of course) in a handicap tables match tonight. Kennedy and Orton stare at each other and shake hands.
WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Paul London and Brian Kendrick vs. MNM
HOLY FUCKING SHIT MELINA IS LOOKING NICE TONIGHT!
Michael Cole mentions that Ashley and Melina have been having a blog battle on WWE.com, really? I didn't know this and i'm sure nobody else knew. Paul London wins the award for worst looking landing after attempting to dropkick Joey Mercury and catching the top rope with his feet and landing flat on his face. Ow! Finish was Melina attempting to push London off the top rope only to be foiled by Ashley who smacks her head off the mat, allowing London to hit a cross body to retain the titles. This was a fine but very short match in my opinion but i have one last comment to make. Melina, you are increadibly hot but there is one thing that annoys me...your constant screaming. SHUT THE FUCKING HELL UP!
Kristal attempted to interview Kane and she asked him how far is he willing to go with The Great Khali and Kane answered...all the way holding up the hook. So we can expect a hook related sex scene in the Kane vs. Khali match at Wrestlemania.
Chavo Guerrero vs. Jimmy Wang Yang NON TITLE
JBL made the line of night when describing Mr. Yang: "Michael Hayes and Kendo Nagasaki has an offpsring" I laughed so hard at this comment. This was an OK cruiserweight match that no one in the crowd cared about, they were too busy staring at their hands in amazement at the size of them. Jimmy Wang Yang won with a top rope moonsault.
A tribute video aired for the late Arnold Skaaland.
MVP penis made his way down to the ring for a match but not against anyone on the Smackdown roster. This week he introduced us to the 6 feet plus, weighing over 248 lbs and Liechtenstein Heavyweight Champion Cedrick Von Haussen~!
MVP beat on Haussen for a bit and then hit the Playmaker for the win. Whoopie!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Orton and Kennedy were backstage stroking a table...weird.
Handicap Tables Match
Bobby Lashley vs. Mr. Kennedy & Randy Orton
Lashley won by putting both Kennedy and Orton through tables. SHOCKER!
Kristal attempted to interview Batista but since Dave is 10,000 years old all we could hear was "Ug, ug ug ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Chris Benoit vs. Gregory Helms
For some reason, we join this match in action. Helms dominants the early part of the match but quickly enough Benoit gets control and proceeds to HUMBLE Mr. Helms. Benoit gets the win through german suplex, headbutt and placing Helms in the crossface for the win.
This was good match to build up Benoit for his title defence at Wrestlemania and hopefully the destruction of MVP.
And the next inductees into the WWE Hall Of Fame is...The Wild Samoans.
As we cut back to Cole and JBL, JBL says he has got some business to attend to and leaves Cole all own his own. This could be dangerous.
We then cut to Teddy Long offering Kristal his...rose only to be foiled by none other than JBL who had a proposition for Long. He wanted to interview Batista and The Undertaker at the same time 2 days away from Wrestlemania, Long asked if he wanted to get in the middle of that situation. JBL claimed he had a plan so Long said what the hell and said JBL had his interview.
The 10,000 year old man was making his way to the entrance only to be attacked by King Booker and Finlay who layed him out.
MAIN EVENT TIME!!!!
King Booker & Finlay vs. The Undertaker & Batista?
Batista did not make it to the ring so we had our second handicap match of the evening. This was a good match that went back and forth for a while. JBL threw out a line about Batista being the underdog. First off, i find that offensive to dogs as they can move a lot better than Batista and secondly dogs react to stuff happening. Finish came around as Undertaker went for a double chokeslam and Finlay hit him with the shillelagh for the DQ. Finlay and Booker continued the beat down until Batista finally made his way down to the ring for the save. Batista set up Booker for the Batista bomb and Undertaker set up Finlay for the Last Ride when Dave threw Booker into Undertaker knocking all three of them down. With his job done, Batista set off for the OAP home for Tapioca and the show ended.
This was another medicore show with only one left until Wrestlemania 23, i can only hope something of interest happens next week.
Now with that out of the way, let's get onto this show.
Vincent Kennedy McMahon made his way down to the ring in shitty Cleveland, Ohio to address the retards in attendance. Vince said he had fun on Raw this week and sent a message to Donald Trump with his actions towards Eugene, the official mascot of Ohio State University. A video recap then aired showing the destruction of Eugene by Umaga and subsequent shaving.
Vince then goes on a tirade about how when he shaves Trump bald at Wrestlemania, it will be him symbolically shaving every man, woman, child and baby in the arena. Vince likes them shaved is what i took from that statement. He also reminds us that he will be facing Bobby Lashley on Raw this coming Monday night and decides that he wants to have some fun tonight. He introduces who will be Lashley's opponent...KENNEDY! Mr. Kennedy comes down to the ring and Vince steals his line.
Proud of himself, he then introduces Lashley's other opponent...Randy Orton! Unable to control his excitement of having two shaven men in the ring...he climbs up on the top rope and does Randy Orton's pose. The crowd shit all over Orton which is fine by me. Orton then begins to verbally give Vince head with compliments, unable to wait his turn Kennedy grabs the mic and takes over the act.
Vince then announces that Lashley will be taking on both men at the same time (just the way Ric Gillespie likes it...joking of course) in a handicap tables match tonight. Kennedy and Orton stare at each other and shake hands.
WWE Tag Team Championship Match
Paul London and Brian Kendrick vs. MNM
HOLY FUCKING SHIT MELINA IS LOOKING NICE TONIGHT!
Michael Cole mentions that Ashley and Melina have been having a blog battle on WWE.com, really? I didn't know this and i'm sure nobody else knew. Paul London wins the award for worst looking landing after attempting to dropkick Joey Mercury and catching the top rope with his feet and landing flat on his face. Ow! Finish was Melina attempting to push London off the top rope only to be foiled by Ashley who smacks her head off the mat, allowing London to hit a cross body to retain the titles. This was a fine but very short match in my opinion but i have one last comment to make. Melina, you are increadibly hot but there is one thing that annoys me...your constant screaming. SHUT THE FUCKING HELL UP!
Kristal attempted to interview Kane and she asked him how far is he willing to go with The Great Khali and Kane answered...all the way holding up the hook. So we can expect a hook related sex scene in the Kane vs. Khali match at Wrestlemania.
Chavo Guerrero vs. Jimmy Wang Yang NON TITLE
JBL made the line of night when describing Mr. Yang: "Michael Hayes and Kendo Nagasaki has an offpsring" I laughed so hard at this comment. This was an OK cruiserweight match that no one in the crowd cared about, they were too busy staring at their hands in amazement at the size of them. Jimmy Wang Yang won with a top rope moonsault.
A tribute video aired for the late Arnold Skaaland.
MVP penis made his way down to the ring for a match but not against anyone on the Smackdown roster. This week he introduced us to the 6 feet plus, weighing over 248 lbs and Liechtenstein Heavyweight Champion Cedrick Von Haussen~!
MVP beat on Haussen for a bit and then hit the Playmaker for the win. Whoopie!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Orton and Kennedy were backstage stroking a table...weird.
Handicap Tables Match
Bobby Lashley vs. Mr. Kennedy & Randy Orton
Lashley won by putting both Kennedy and Orton through tables. SHOCKER!
Kristal attempted to interview Batista but since Dave is 10,000 years old all we could hear was "Ug, ug ug ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Chris Benoit vs. Gregory Helms
For some reason, we join this match in action. Helms dominants the early part of the match but quickly enough Benoit gets control and proceeds to HUMBLE Mr. Helms. Benoit gets the win through german suplex, headbutt and placing Helms in the crossface for the win.
This was good match to build up Benoit for his title defence at Wrestlemania and hopefully the destruction of MVP.
And the next inductees into the WWE Hall Of Fame is...The Wild Samoans.
As we cut back to Cole and JBL, JBL says he has got some business to attend to and leaves Cole all own his own. This could be dangerous.
We then cut to Teddy Long offering Kristal his...rose only to be foiled by none other than JBL who had a proposition for Long. He wanted to interview Batista and The Undertaker at the same time 2 days away from Wrestlemania, Long asked if he wanted to get in the middle of that situation. JBL claimed he had a plan so Long said what the hell and said JBL had his interview.
The 10,000 year old man was making his way to the entrance only to be attacked by King Booker and Finlay who layed him out.
MAIN EVENT TIME!!!!
King Booker & Finlay vs. The Undertaker & Batista?
Batista did not make it to the ring so we had our second handicap match of the evening. This was a good match that went back and forth for a while. JBL threw out a line about Batista being the underdog. First off, i find that offensive to dogs as they can move a lot better than Batista and secondly dogs react to stuff happening. Finish came around as Undertaker went for a double chokeslam and Finlay hit him with the shillelagh for the DQ. Finlay and Booker continued the beat down until Batista finally made his way down to the ring for the save. Batista set up Booker for the Batista bomb and Undertaker set up Finlay for the Last Ride when Dave threw Booker into Undertaker knocking all three of them down. With his job done, Batista set off for the OAP home for Tapioca and the show ended.
This was another medicore show with only one left until Wrestlemania 23, i can only hope something of interest happens next week.
Labels: OCC Television Coverage, Smackdown, WWE
posted by Euan Taylor at 3/24/2007 06:25:00 PM
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