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Monday, January 15, 2007

The Aftermath: TNA Final Resolution 2007

You read my coverage, now for my thoughts. This will be the last word on Final Resolution for hopefully another year. Warning, this column contains a horrifying visual thought proceed at your own digression.

Thumb position: down, this show didn't offend me so much as it was just incredibly boring. There were some things I found quite stupid on this show and I will run them all down. This was a boring show that actually had some moderately decent in ring.

Best Match: Kurt Angle Vs. Samoa Joe, this was not as good as either of their previous matches. It didn't have the drama or the heat and once you got to where it was 3-2, you knew what was coming.

Worst Match: The Main Event. I lost track of who was interfering and who's side they were on and why. Vince Russo has a lot of problems and 1 of the biggies is swerving people to the point where they don't know what outcome they're supposed to even want to see so they stop caring.

Worst Finish: Ok, so apparently the world heavyweight title can change on a disqualification but the tag titles do not. I don't understand that one but that was not the worst offender.
So AJ Styles can tell that Rhino is about to Gore him a third time so rather than take it he loses on purpose. He knows enough to know where he is and what's coming but would be unable to avoid the move if he got up? Not only that but he just lost a match on purpose. If this were a real sport they'd call that kind of thing point shaving and you can go to jail for that. AJ basically said I'd rather lose than get beat up which makes no sense. I can't decide if this finish is even worse than the finish of the tag title match from last year's show but its close.

Best way to drag something out: The Bob Backlund thing was an example of a story that is told in comedy quite often. If you play a joke out, it will get laughs, if you play it out long enough people will stop laughing and if you play it out further than that they'll laugh even harder. The Bob Backlund stuff tonight must have been the exception to this rule because they lost the audience and never got them back.

Worst outcome of best intension's: Something tells me that the Christy Hemme idea was at least influenced a bit by Dixie Carter. The problem is that wrestling is a male dominated industry because it is a male dominated fan base. Christy's promo was OK but she's the heel in this feud even though she stands for equality against a chauvinist pig in Kip James.

Most predictable outcome: Wrestler A pins Wrestler B to win Wrestler C's title. Sabin pinned Lynn and won Daniels' title. Is this the only finish to a 3-way that Russo knows? I've just had a horrid thought but its in my head so I'm sharing it with the world but you've been warmed. I bet that Russo was in a threesome, did all of the work on the girl and had the other guy steal the orgasm. I know that's quite the visual and I'm standing at the sink next to you trying to decide which liquid will burn my eyes the fastest but that has to be how he's fixated on this one.

Final thoughts: Watching Raw made me want to watch this show as I thought I'd see some decent wrestling even if the booking was hit or miss or way miss or dude not in the same universe miss. However, watching this show made me want to watch Raw another try.

Thumbs so far down.

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